Last time I spoke to my friend Tom he told me ‘bout a holiday he went on he said he needed to get away so he went to Turkey on a holiday he didn’t have a passport so he borrowed one and a friend he gave him his with a haw and a hum Tom …
Life is hard boy it’s rough You went and left me you said you had enough I feel so lonely I got nothing to lose But now that you’re gone I got a licence to play the blues Has anyone ever loved you as much as I do Come on honey now and tell the …
Well they come into town with their cameras loaded Like modern day Trojans in their air-conditioned coaches Stand in line efficiently ordered then walk around in circles with their maps unfolded Chorus They been dreamin’ all year about havin’ some fun when they’re workin’ in the land of the risin’ sun They’ll look you in …
Well the pubs are all closed and it’s time to hit the sack But Johnny’s feeling peckish so he’ll stop to have a snack He likes the admiration that he gets from the gals When he enters the kingdom of the Doner kebab When they stop and whisper look who’s back Who’s that dude well …
At the mall Trying to buy food Look at the press and there’s Only bad news War in the middle east Corrupt president But in the midst of this gloom I learn Jen has found love again But Jen Has found love again Home in the evening She got no place to go Been working …
Well she’s hanging out the washing hanging it on the line Hanging out the washing today it’s gonna be fine But the sunshine’s gone from my life without you Yeah your washing may dry but my tears never do She’s hanging out the washing hanging it on the line Hanging out the washing in the …
I never agreed that it’s quality that counts and anything that comes my way man I’m gonna pounce people stop and ask me if I’m goin’ blind but I not fussy I’ll take anything I’ll find You don’t need to look like a beauty queen or a plastic top model from a magazine Go ugly …
I’ve never seen a man so forlorn He sleeps all day and he drinks alone He spends all day locked up at home His girlfriend’s left him he’s got fired from his job He’s been through this many times before But he just won’t listen no he can’t be told And now he’s suffering like …
Woke up in my trailer at dawn, lit a cigarette and I gave a yawn I decided that it was time that I gave you a piece of my mind Chorus Get your bitch-ass back to Minnesota cause round here honey you don’t fit Get you bitch-ass back to Minnesota cause you don’t talk nothin …
If you come walkin’ along down my street you might hear a howls and a shouts my baby don’t like my nasty habits says that I never take her out ooooooooooh You eat like a pig and you eat like a hog with a snort snort snort snort snort snort snort the washin’ better be …
